Why does what I wear bother you?
Stumbled on an article on Ebony.com about a curvy professor who received backlash about her tight jeans and heels. I’ll post the link below for you to read.
After I read the article I knew I had to weigh in.
Let me just say that humans can be really annoying and I can relate. I’ve been slim thick my entire life. I stand about 5’2.5” (yes I claim my .5) and I’m 135 lbs mostly ass and hips. My butt is large and attracts lots of attention from both men and women.
This made me selective when it came to choosing clothes. Not too tight. Not too form fitting. Not because I don’t enjoy wearing them but quite honestly, the reactions and comments I get are annoying. Things I hear…
“Is your butt real?”
“Girl your booty looks like it’s in 3-D”
“You thicka’ den peanut butta”
“It ain’t your beauty, it’s your booty”
Newsflash folks, that ish ain’t cute! I’ve even had someone I work with smack my ass and say “ooh girl I need one of those”. I almost slap that b#%^@ in the face. Fact, this was a white woman and more often than not, they’re the most infatuated; speaking from my experience. Between my ass and my hair I’m like a rare species they’ve never encountered and must learn more about.
Truth serum, I should not be responsible for one’s lack of maturity, obsession or sexualization of my curvaceous body in certain clothing! It doesn’t matter if I’m wearing a maxi dress (shout out to Devale & Khadeen Ellis and his maxi dress song), biker shorts, sweats or jeans it’s not going to change my shape. I’m still gonna be thick!
Let me address the church and its folk before I end this!
“Now you know you too shapely for that”
“That’s not appropriate for church”
“Girl you go have the pastor lookin’”
It didn’t matter if I was fully covered or if my skirt/dress was below my knees. What mattered is how I looked in the clothing or how someone else viewed me in it. I couldn’t help how I was shaped! It was mess just like that which made me an insecure teen and young adult that hated my body.
I chose more loose fitting clothing because of asinine comments from ignorant individuals made to me and the ones made to the professor. Because of mom’s who felt like my shape was too distracting for their sons. Or insecure wives who had spouses with wondering eyes 👀.
Now I’m 39 and things are different. I no longer give any f*^%# about what people think. I love my curvy body and my big booty!
Listen to me when I say, I will NOT and I repeat, will NOT choose my clothing based on the insecurities or judgement of others. I will continue to choose what’s comfortable, cute, and makes me feel pretty (even if it hugs me tightly).
Shout out to the Professor Ms. Nerissa Reaves. I salute you queen! I salute your confidence and boldness in choosing you and what makes you look and feel good. From one curvy girl to another.
Until next time…💛