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Caring For Sick Parents ▎No More Capacity

If I told you how much stress I’ve been under the past few weeks, you wouldn’t believe me.

Have you ever been in a season that felt like a punishment? That tests your faith? That made you question God’s intentions and existence? In a season where you couldn’t even pray? That is the season I have been in. Now let me say, there have been some very exciting happenings that have occurred in my life recently and still so much good that exists and for that I’m so very grateful, but the load I’ve been carrying has been heavy!

Earlier this year I wrote about aging parents, but today I want to address SICK & aging parents.

On Friday November 22nd my father passed out on IHOP. He was taken to emergency, evaluated and admitted into the ICU that same night. Now, when I say things escalated quickly, they escalated quickly. He went from eating breakfast to the family making difficult decisions about his health.

I’ll give you a brief health history. Some years ago my father had major surgery after discovering he had six aortic aneurysms. Two were left behind because his body could not handle any more surgery. He’s been watched ever since. This man is like an energizer bunny! He takes a lickin’ and keeps on tickin’! Let’s move on.

As the go-to person when it comes to the care of my parents and my disabled brother this incident has added an extra layer and this shit has been hard and heavy! Days spent at the hospital, talks with doctors, procedure after procedure and sleepless nights. At one point, I stopped answering my phone and responding to texts. Why? Because I have to remain sane and I have no more capacity, literally.

Let me say this, my “stuff” doesn’t compare to what my father is experiencing so this blog is not for pity, but I want people to understand how heavy things can get when caring for sick parents or family members and what you can do to help.

When there is one “go-to” family member handling the care and day to day affairs of parents or a loved one, here a few simple things you (outside family members) can do that cost you nothing and will relieve some stress.

  1. Ask them how they are doing.

  2. Send an encouraging text

  3. Offer food

  4. Acknowledge what they’re doing by saying “thank you”

  5. Save your unsolicited advice

  6. Offer help if you can

These few things make a huge difference!

As of today, my father is still hospitalized but out of ICU. He may be able to go home soon, but he has a long road ahead of him! I pray that this blog encourages and informs!

Until next time…🦋

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